How to Transition Back to Work After Maternity Leave: Insights from Twenty Women Leaders
Returning to a high-pressure career after maternity leave is not for the faint of heart. You’re balancing your career and motherhood for the first time, and it can feel like you’re falling short on both fronts. And you start to wonder if it's even possible to grow the career you’ve worked so hard to build while being the parent you want to be. I’ve been there twice myself — navigating the challenges, making mistakes, and finding my way forward.
I interviewed twenty working mothers in a range of careers, including law firm partners, executives, military officers, advisors to the U.S. Department of Defense and more, to learn about how they managed their transition and what they learned from it. I found that, with the right mindset and support systems in place, returning to work can not only be manageable but empowering. While every mother's journey is unique, below are seven key guiding principles to help you find a path that works for you and your family.
(1) Embrace the change
The first year back at work after maternity leave can feel overwhelming. Your mind constantly shifts between career goals and baby needs, and the “mommy brain” is real. Identities you once embraced —like lawyer, traveler, or fitness enthusiast — now take a backseat to being a mother. You may struggle with the instinct to be with your baby above all else, leaving you questioning your ambitions. You are sleep deprived. And it’s tempting to walk away from it all.
So, what do you do? Start by embracing the change. Accept that this phase is tough and comes with its challenges. It’s normal to feel uncertain and overwhelmed, but the sooner you accept this new reality, the easier it gets. Remember, this phase is temporary, and you’ll find your rhythm.
(2) Redefine success
One of the toughest challenges for high-achieving women returning to work is redefining what success looks like. Before your baby, success might have meant saying yes to everything, billing the most hours, or staying at the top of your game. Naturally, you might feel the urge to dive back in at full speed after maternity leave to make up for lost time.
But in your first year back, success looks different. It’s about showing up and “staying in” rather than constantly pushing yourself. Success is also about what you accomplish at home, not just at work — maybe you get a few things done at the office and a few things done at home. Defining clear metrics for success will serve as your north star, guiding you through this transition and helping you stay focused on what truly matters.
Redefining success doesn’t make you any less committed or valuable. You’re navigating new territory, and it’s okay to not be at full speed right away. Your ambition hasn’t disappeared — it just looks different right now. Be gentle with yourself as you adapt.
(3) Have the right expectations
It’s easy to believe you need to be the perfect mother and the perfect employee, all at the same time. Society promotes the idea that you should always be there for your child and that you should also perform flawlessly at work. However, the reality is that it’s not possible. Trying to excel at everything at the same time is a recipe for burnout.
Letting go of perfectionism is key to easing your transition back to work. This means being flexible and adjusting when needed — whether it’s shifting work priorities, taking time off for a sick child, or asking for help. Pivoting isn’t a failure; it shows resilience.
It’s also important to recognize that there’s no such thing as perfect balance. Some weeks, your family needs more of you. Other weeks, work takes priority. It’s about finding what works for you and being okay with compromise. Remember, one tough week doesn’t mean you are failing.
(4) Build new toolsets
Transitioning back to work means developing new tools that you didn’t need before.
Open communication with your manager and colleagues is key. Be clear about your needs, like when you’ll need to leave or be unavailable due to family commitments. Setting these boundaries upfront ensures expectations are managed and your time is respected.
Prioritization and delegation are key tools for new moms returning to work. By focusing on what matters most, both at work and at home, you can confidently say no to tasks that don’t align with your goals. Delegating responsibilities, whether to colleagues or family, allows you to lighten your load while get things done. Trusting others with responsibilities not only frees up your time but also helps you juggle your career and motherhood more effectively. These approaches help you stay true to your definition of success and reduces the guilt of feeling like you have to do it all.
Lastly, celebrate your wins. It’s easy to dwell on what didn’t get done, but recognizing even small successes, like balancing work and family for the day, boosts confidence and keeps you feeling in control.
(5) Tackle the internal obstacles
Many moms fear that they will be viewed by their colleagues as less committed because of their new responsibilities at home. But being a mother doesn’t lessen your value in the workplace—it enhances it. Parenthood builds new skills, like multi-tasking, empathy, and resilience. Former Supreme Court Justice Ruth Bader Ginsburg credited parenting for giving her balance and perspective in her career. As she wrote, “Each part of my life provided respite from the other…Having [my daughter] gave me a better sense of what life is.”
Another common fear is feeling you are behind your peers because of the time you took off. Focus on the quality of your work, not the hours you log, and avoid comparing yourself to colleagues without kids. Comparisons only distract you from your achievements.
(6) Lean on others
The biggest lesson from other working moms is that you don’t have to do it all alone. Building a strong support system, both at work and home, is key.
At work, use any flexibility your company offers — whether it’s remote work, part-time schedules, or gradual-return programs. These policies can give you breathing room as you adjust, and leaning on them doesn’t make you any less committed. Connecting with other working moms can also be important.
At home, ensure you have solid childcare arrangement in place — whether it’s day-care, a nanny, or family-help — and remember, it’s about what works best for your family. If you have a partner, share the responsibilities, and don’t hesitate to outsource chores like meal-prep or cleaning. There's no one-size-fits-all solution, so find the set-up that works for you. The goal is to establish a routine that allows you to take care of yourself and create space for the things you love outside of work and parenting. When you make time for yourself, you’ll feel better and show up stronger in every aspect of your life
(7) Connect to joy
Despite the challenges, there’s a lot of joy in being a working mother. Like Ginsburg, many find that parenting isn’t a barrier to success but a source of motivation. Work gives you a chance to re-engage your mind, face new challenges, and take a break from the constant demands of motherhood. Plus, you’re setting a powerful example for your kids as they watch you juggle both work and family. When things click, there’s a deep sense of fulfillment as both your career and your family grow.
Returning to work as a new mom is undoubtedly challenging, but it’s also a chance to evolve, both personally and professionally. By being open to change, letting go of perfection, and leaning on your support systems, you'll find a path that works for you. There’s no better goal than being able to thrive in your career while being present for your family — it’s what we all strive for.
If you want to listen to a short podcast on this topic, here’s a 12-minute listen I created using NotebookLM: https://notebooklm.google.com/notebook/69b1ddeb-cae7-448c-a763-3098e30c1ed1/audio
Please reach out to me if you need professional assistance with this matter. Drop me a note through the Contact page if you have any questions.
